I want to see the sky, I want to see you lie, these words aren’t meant for you, there meant for I. Idolatry, iconoclastic, take me passed this burning matchstick. Robbed of sight and hard of hearing, lead astray to life’s grand clearing. Does the night yet long for the day, lingering fraught with agony and dismay. The tortured soul fixed between two equal impossibilities, and the walls are closing in. I feel as if I could drown in the shallow end of my intention, the weight of a decision still creeping beyond apprehension. What makes a man, how come no one seems to understand, that I wake up everyday, alone and in pain. A pain, I can not see, or taste, or touch, I’ve felt it for so long now, a desire to be known. Though, I fear I’ll miss the serene silence I’ve become accustomed to, wondering if making an impression, is really worth the trouble. Will I be a dead poet in a society of some distant future, before I finally make, my mark on the world.
just for tonight stop looking……
to discover whats already here…
so where does my adventure begin,
what great ocean awaits….
i must first define what i need to stop looking for so i can know myself, but not what i imagine myself to
be, because the person i dream of, is an illusion blocking me from the truth. i imagine a man, great, noble, brilliant, but also; licentious, corrupted, and insane; i imagine a man wanting the best for the world, to see all suffering eradicated and true utopia arise as humanity reaches for its full potential, and yet; lustfully dreams of destruction for all things, to drag the world so far down, our eyes sufficate in the all consuming shroud of darkness, and the sounds of the dying…the cries of the dead…, become a continuum of agony, as dystopia desends upon humanity, they reach for the ashes of a broken future.
that is who i imagine i am….
but i also imagine a “real” version,
a secondary illusion…
i see a ghost, a watcher, moving through life on an empty train, looking out through the window, time moves fast, only lingering on the times i should have been, i often wonder; wandering from instant to
instant, why am i, who am i, where do i belong, the world turns to dust as i watch the home movies of my life over…..and over, trapped inside the misery of my own soliloquy. a solitary existance, carefully planning one move to the next, trying to avoid failure, but failing to start playing. i also see a shadow, silent, guarded, and afraid; quietly afraid of what i have to say, i fear I’m hiding who i am today, always living behind, the times eroding my memory, what do i do, when will be to late, why…..?, these things i say inside my head, as the world eclipses me, my eyes bleed, clearly i taste the bitter reality, all i have is nothing, a glass waiting and just that, the substance of my forfillment is unobtainable, and yet
inescapable….on a ghost train to nowhere…..
and now…….what is left?………
I’ve learned so much, yet know so little, I speak so much lesser, then this disquieted mind can muster. Fevered dreams and fervent feelings, thine tongues twisted epithets, grace such cold dark spaces of this hollow universe. The graying of my eyes, an entropic merger of both light and dark, a consolidation of my shadow, with the neverending radiance of my soul. How hath thouest come to bear such great burdening, at the behest of the world. Why doth this time stand so devoid of mystery, adventure, and purpose. What is left in this world, but the lonely ancient remnants of a history forgotten.
Why do I feel like escaping so early in the morning, only to be sold on staying by the afternoon. It hurts so much this longing to be certain. The paradox of trying to hold on to the status quo, while your mind wonders beyond, reaching for more, for something new, a path of deeper meaning, one that brings greater purpose to a life gone dull, its edges blunted, and colors drained of vibrancy. Though, why do we fain such constrained fealty, to an existence growing colder by the day. Do we normalize, these empty versions, overlaying a world given a chance to succeed, a pareidolia, a phantom image, creating an environment we can tolerate. Though, in our tolerance, a languishing of present tense, rusts away a seemingly solid foundation, until, nothing is left, of the man you used to be. Do the mighty succumb to such encumbrances, or is the key to power a finding of this said certainty, yet the preclusion of nullified turbulence, can never be undone by a mere wanten desire alone. Its must take root, from base singularity to fully extended expression. So, when will I taste the delicious pleasures of fruitful ambition, learning to release my grasp on my petrifying old beliefs, and set sail, on a harsher, yet stronger current, rife with risk and danger, but in the end, non greater can be forged, but through the trials of their labours, being taken by difficulty, with the guardians at the gate of your attainment, the ghosts of all your past failures, standing as the greatest obstacles you must over come.
This world might as well be the surface of mars to me, a barren unforgiving landscape, providing a neverending trial, of emptiness. Just pretend there’s no one here, just pretend your in a blank world, operate as if you, are the only actor left behind the curtain. Why simply stare, starved of enduring meaning, to be stricken with such cruel loneliness. To see the dull destiny that awaits, a premonition of bottomless ambition, devoid of solid ground, no further can I rise passed this fated day, beleaguered like the coming age, sidelined before I could even play. Raptured by the wrapping serpent, constrictor, forcing my corpses heart to yet linger, beating beats beyond burden, grasping grown grievances gluttonous gorge, feeling fragments finely festering, deeply burrowing, sickening my state of mind. Drop the act, that everything is ok, destroyed now, just breathing in the pain. Go on now, master of the tamed…..
Permanent inactivation of oversaturated neural pathways, leading to regressive damage in behavioral core synaptic networks. Relating to the mind state of anhedonia, though expressed in a more extreme context. The neurotic features, create a formless sensation, passing transcribed emotional coding into redundant structures. This mental apparatus, propagates a dissociative syndrome, fostering a suppressed status with short periods of psychotic outbursts. This neurodegenerative disorder, has potentially devastating and dangerous consequences if left to fester and grow. the oscillating current of suppressed and unsuppressed functions, could lead to a heightened potency of para psychological aspects of a subjects personality. Maintain vigilance and planning for worst case scenarios.
Seed ships that carry human genetic components, removing the need for generational starships. These ships begin helical synthesis forming adaptive human embryos, with that appropriate properties given the xeno biology of the new exoplanetary habitat. Through a method of combining cybernetic, unique genetic structures or molecules to forming zygotic matrices, creating parallel sapien species subject to counter earth conditions. Efforts to make integration pathways to incorporate parallel clusters into existing human populations on earth, this must be a high priority, preventing dislocations in a pluralistic interplanetary civilization, aswell as increasing and strengthening genetic diversity, matching expansion balance growth equations. The negative outcomes of non reciprocal expansionism could lead to a singularity exponentially furthering biological latency and genetic stagnation postulated in the gene fatalist hypothesis.
BEYOND GOOD \/ EVIL
UNITY \/ DOMINANCE
CREATION \/ DESTRUCTION
LIGHT \/ DARKNESS
1. Persecuted for Righteousness 1. Pride
2. Merciful / Peacemaker 2. Wrath
3. Pure of Heart 3. Envy
4. Mournful / Rejoice 4. Lust
5. Hungery after Righteousness 5. Gluttony
6. Meek 6. Sloth
7. Poor in Spirit 7. Avarice
BALANCE \/ CHAOS
1. Rapture 1. Agony
2. Tranquility 2. Struggle
3. Life 3. Death
4. Pleasure 4. Pain
5. Love 5. Hatred
6. Happiness 6. Sadness
7. Sanity 7. Madness
8. Peace 8. War
9. Benevolent 9. Malevolent
10. Utopia 10. Dystopia
FAITH \/ CONTROL
1. Divine Truth 1. Forbidden Knowledge
2. Fear Abominations 2. Axis of power
3. Pure tongue 3. Enigma
4. Sabbath (7th Day) 4. Armag/Apocalypse
5. Honour Fa../Mo.. 5. Lilith
6. Destiny/Fate 6. Mark of Kain
7. Betrayers Guilt 7. Iscariot Doctrine
8. Mercantilism 8. Mammons Conquest
9. Liars Poison 9. Machiavellianism
10. Covet Silence 10. Amraphel of Shinar
ULTIMATE / VOID \ ENTITIES
\ / \ / Chaos Barrier
1. Elohim / Allah 1. Outer Gods
2. Seraphim / Cherubim 2. Salanh / Apophis
/Dragon Class\ /Leviathan Class\
3. Archangels / Angels 3. Archdemon/ Demon
4. Garden Kin / Man 4. Lilith kin / Man
/PROTO CORPOREAL FORMATION\
5. Extracorporeal Soul 5. Precursion Link
/Divine Creation\ /Void Tether\
/QUANTUM FIELD SATURATION\
6. Luminous Accretion 6.Entropic Accretion
/Pure Filament\ /Holographic Horizon\
Chaos Barrier / /\ \ First Seed
7. Yliaster / Prime Matter
ULTIMATE / VOID \ ENTITIES
Decoding entropy, the misguided existential question thats been plaguing humanity, since time in memorium, has been as such, thusly explained through our insatiable curious need, and desire to know where we came from. At first, in the dawning of our sapien species, we began an almost instinctual process, of divining meanings behind the waking world, fixated on a relativistic methodology of categorizing, that which our senses provided only infinitesimal instances of articulable realizations. Though, in time, our understanding over these secret mechanisms precluding higher agency, would be elucidated. A furtherance of hope was lost, for the knowledge gained hadn’t changed the conspicuously absent absolution of civilizations greatest of quandaries. The religious interpretation attempts to rationalize the intrinsic significance of the universal landscape, putting forth a poly or monotheistic version of all existence, placing a God figure manipulating the entirety of creation, a top the hierarchy of cosmological structures. Still, this answer doesn’t provide us with clear evidence or help in truly delving to the fathomless depths of the predecessent primordial universe. As such, the secular interpretations do sit in stark contrast to the theological hypotheses, with its extrinsic properties revealing many truths along the continuum scale of the micro/macroscopic spectrum, attributed to the methodically evidentiary basis, in which, scientific principles and experimental techniques are rooted in. Though, quantum theory has brought ingeniously astringent results, placing the observable mind on the precipice of the ancient universe, so to has its energetic machinations lingered for far too long, incrementally discovering only slivers of information, leading to the theological constructions of endpoint equational resolution, also being expressed in the scientific literature, blurring the lines of both religious and secular types of reasoning. Which brings me to the main topic, decoding entropy. Gods, quantum fields, souls, particles, heaven&hell, dark energy&matter, what do they all have in common? They are all, elementary focal points of a larger, underlying superstructure, of the world we see around us. These, markers of entropy, could be the keys to developing a algorithmic solution, to decoding entropic accretion, revealing the prime components of our reality. To begin, a multilayered source vector analysis, of associative precursion links between matrices, along the holographic horizon, providing exculpatory evidence of derived impressionistic values, beyond current exploratory methods, must take place. Though, viewing principles of modern science and faith so Antidisestablishmentarianistically, is necessary for deciphering beyond the codexis of these simultaneously existing archetypal concepts, to escape their intrinsic and extrinsic influence over helically modelled neurological functioning, as each are an expression of collective organic somatic clustering, produced over billions of years. As such, moving apart from biologically synthesized harvesting of the quattrouvirgintillion bits of data stored in the hegemonicly recursive hierarchical predimentional statuses, could provide the first foot well, on the journey up the mountain, of total equational defragmentation, consequently illuminating laylines, of extracorporeal formation, finally answering, the oldest and most fundamental of questions.
Why are we here?
dreaming dynastic divinities, denoting depths deeply drowning dumbfounded diatribes. Denounce deduced denigration, delineated dissertations disintegration, despite doubting deference, dictated dare dysgenic deliberation. Divisively dissimilar, desiccated dephibralator, drawing decayed demons, disturbed drones drink deprived delinquents. Drove drunk down dry divergences, domestication dies dressed duplicitously. Dancing delirium, directed deuterium, divisions due, decades Deliverance, decadent dismemberment, deciphering disenchanted dialogues. Does dreaming dilapidated dystopian descriptions, deem days doomed. dawn dared dry drops descendant, drained driven deception, damage done derailed deepening digression. Distressingly deciding, deplorable devil’s dine delicately, dripping delicious devolution’s devoid demarcation. Depressingly Dark demeanor…..done drifting… dreaming deceiver…